Chapel Hill, NC — Addressing a small gathering of fellow students in the bedroom of his Carr Street apartment, Bryce Leland, junior Peace, War, and Defense major, offered a scathing critique of UNC’s registration system, describing the process of enrollment for his spring 2014 courses as “too fucking hard.”
Leland then winced, placed a fist over his mouth, and expelled a thick cloud of marijuana smoke from his lungs.
“Yeah man, ConnectCarolina is fucked,” he continued, to the commiserating head shakes and knowing glances of his peers. “Unless you know exactly what you need to take for all the gen-eds and shit, good luck finding anything on there. It won’t even let you do a class search if there are more than 150 results, and you have to check the box for next semester every time or else it shows you shit for this semester. It’s literally retarded.”
Leland went on to cough for several seconds and mutter “shit,” before reaching once more for the lighter and bong on his bedside table.
“Not to mention that it logs you out like every 10 minutes and then makes you log out again before you can log back in,” he proceeded, his eyes watering following another heavy rip. “I mean, how fucking hard is it to make a website?”
Several members of Leland’s audience echoed his sentiments, remarking “damn” and “I don’t even know.” Others sat expressionless, silently contemplating his words.
“I only got into like two of the classes I need,” concluded Leland, traces of smoke rising from his mouth past the Pulp Fiction poster on his wall. “I hope I can still finish my major.”