Sociology Student Files for Restraining Order from Math Professor

CHAPEL HILL, NC — In a private Honor Court hearing this morning, Charlotte Mason, junior sociology major, filed for a restraining order from her Calculus I professor, Jeffery Tinder.

In a sworn statement, Mason said that, since the beginning of the semester, Tinder has “given [her] problems” both in class and via the Internet.

“After just a few weeks, he was asking me to do things I can’t even imagine,” she said. “I’ve tried to stay away from him, but he’s sent me multiple emails warning me that missing his class will be ‘costly.'”

Describing Tinder as “relentless” and “calculating”, Mason provided chilling details of her encounters with the diminutive 83-year-old educator, citing his repeated invitations to “further engage with the material” in office hours, as well as a written document that Tinder gave her outlining his planned harassment for the semester.

Following the hearing, Tinder, who has taught at UNC for the past 30 years, was officially charged with Harassment of a Humanities Student, which carries a sentence of five years of teaching pre-calculus. The bow-tied old man called the charge, “erroneous and illogical”.

“[She] signed up for this. I’m just teaching math,” he said.

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