Lone Drunk Alumnus Still Yelling “TAR” on Franklin Street

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CHAPEL HILL, NC — Standing outside the Library on Franklin Street at 7:00 am, Clifford Teraz, a UNC-CH graduate who currently works for an IT company in Hillsborough, NC, was still yelling “TAR” at all passers-by.

Screaming at students and Chapel Hill residents on their way to breakfast, Teraz, still visibly intoxicated, reportedly approached groups of pedestrians by jumping up and down, waiting for a response, then moving his arm back and forth to indicate the small crowd should respond.

“Woooooo,” said Teraz, who’s soot-stained Carolina blue windbreaker reeked of alcohol and body odor. “Let’s go Heels. Let’s fucking go. I’m out here right now, WOO, graduated in goddamn, I don’t know ’99, I’m out here; WOO I’m feeling it! Man, this place ain’t changed, love this place, WOOO, love UNC. Let’s go Heels. TARRRR!”

Susie Timmons, a runner who encountered Teraz, said that the man’s appetite for revelry seemed insatiable.

“At first, sure, I played along and I said ‘HEELS.’ I’m excited too,” she said. “But he tried to follow me and keep it going, and there’s always a point where you kind of start clapping because you can’t just yell ‘HEELS’ forever.”

At press time Teraz was seen trying to climb over the counter of Sutton’s to sing “Hark The Sound” with the employees.

The Weigh-In: UNC Beats Duke

UNC’s men’s basketball beat Duke 74 to 66 in the Smith Center last night. What’s your take?

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“I accidentally burned a man alive.”

Drom Caldwell, Economics, ’14

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“Doctors say I will be unable to move my arms from this position for two to three weeks.”

Brice Johnson, Undecided, ’16

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“It’s hard because I always get what I want.”

Thayden Richards, Duke University, ’15